Long time ago, but not so far away....

...I had more time to blog. Mind you it wasn't a ton of time, but it was more time. These days, life is sooo busy I don't know where the time has flown. Ioan is 5 months old and has 2 teeth (they just came in on Sunday!!!), Ariana is 6 years old and in 1st grade, Lillian is growing by leaps and bounds...some of her clothes are no longer fitting her reminding me that I need to pull out the next size, and Ethan...well my little man can count to 10 and has more energy than his momma! I have been busy with household and all that that entails. We are busy.
In the midst of this busyness, I was able to sneak away for a few days and attend the

True Woman's conference

( I am sooo illiterate when it comes to links...forgive me!) in Chicago. It was amazing. It was sometimes hard to listen to the messages due to a little Ioan, but what I heard challenged me, showed me areas I was failing as a wife and mother, and encouraged me in becoming more of the woman Christ desires me to be. I know that God wants to change me. I know that I need encouragement to be more of who He wants me to be. I want to change. So, I have started the

30 day makeover

and have been greatly blessed and encouraged in who I am as God's woman. It really is counter to what we hear in tv, media, from those following the culture, and even counter to what we hear in many of our churches. We are not being taught, encouraged, or trained in how to be God's kind of woman. I know that I have been blessed with much encouragement throughout much of my life to be the kind of woman God would have me to be. I was greatly privilaged to live in Thailand with a woman who for a little over 3 months had daily impact and taught me ways to be God's kind of woman and wife as I looked ahead to my marriage to Andy. I have been privilaged to read great books on God's perspective on womanhood and marriage. And yet, I am constantly faced and hear things that are contrary to what I know God has called women to. The teens that I work with are constantly facing and hearing things contrary to God's perspective in school, on tv, and from others. They are hearing these things and yet are not being trained in the area of Biblical womanhood.
One thing that has strenghtend my desire to learn and train others in Biblical womanhood (especially my daughters!) is my reading of the book

Women's Ministry in the Local Church. This book, although I am only in the beginning of it, has already challenged my thinking. It is a theology book for what training and teaching Biblical womanhood is of great importance. I have been challenged with that, and with the 30 day challenge, to revamp my thinking in reguards to my life and my calling. I have been called by God to be His kind of woman, I have been called by God to be His kind of wife, I have been called by God to be His kind of mother, I have been called by God to manage and care for my home. I have been called to be an encouragement to others, especially to other women and young ladies. In all these areas I have been called to display His gosepel and glory. These are the areas I know based on His word that I have been called to do. Everything else...is extra. It is above and beyond the basic calling of God on my life. As I have looked into my life and peered into it, I have come to this conclusion- I am not living out God's call on my life in a way that brings Christ and His gospel honor and glory. This careful consideration has caused me to re-evaluate my life and what I am doing. I have been pricked in my spirit to make changes. Some I have made; others I fear making the change. Why? Ultimately, it's due to my pride- and that is something the Lord has been bringing down as He convicts my heart. I fear people. I fear what others think sometimes. I fear being thought of in a negative way- I hate even the feeling like someone is displeased with me. However, I am learning that until I make Christ my focus and until I make His glory and Name my ultimate desire, until I make His pleasure my delight, I will not be able to be the woman He wants me to be. I need His Spirit to change and soften my heart so that I will display His glory in my life.

So, this is what I have been learning. This is what has been challenging my heart. I pray that I will be the kind of wife who brings glory to God by being a godly wife to Andy and mother to my children so they too will see Christ.