Yesterday at church was great!!!! I loved both morning and eveing service. I love being challenged in the Word and in my thinking. Now, mind you, I am a very opinionated person (ask anyone who's had a discussion with me) and I also tend to be very critical sometimes (which is something I am seeking to change) but I was so greatly reminded yesterday that there needs to always be an end of me. We watched a movie of John Piper speaking at a conference (my gracious Pastor lent me the dvd and I watched the rest of the speakers today) and I was soooo encouraged and reminded of things the Lord spoke and is teaching me on. One thing that has been coursing through my brain is that God's concern is for His glory. That can seem like such a prideful thing, and yet there are so many Scriptures talking about God's passion for Himself which is exactly what we need to have...a passion for HIM!!! He is our example. He is our goal. He is our prize. He is our all. That is what is important. I also loved the focus of the definition of His holiness as being "His infinate value as the absolute perfect moral person (unique and incomprable) He is" (that is a very poor paraphrase of what Pastor Piper said...forgive me..keeping up with note-taking was a challenge as usual). God is the one to value....when Christ died it was not just for our sake (so we could be reconciled with God) but the fact that "He valued the perfection of Himself, His Son, and His Spirit" (as Pastor Piper stated) As John Piper said and I loved this quote God demonstrates love to us when "He sustains and exalts His holiness in His Son for my everlasting enjoyment." That is soooooo awesome...I really long to enjoy God more. I really desire to end the focus on myself and to enjoy Him!!!! But what a challenge it is. I really do think that our relationships would change dramatically. I think our relationship with God would be different, that we would view others in light of the mercy, grace, and love that He has bestowed on us. I think it would make us more loving and forebearing.
Then, in the evening service, we talked about I John (which I am really enjoying the study). The thing that stuck out to me then was that I can have confidence in my salvation because I have that hope...I can have confidence in Christ's return because I have Christ as my righteousness. Not only that, but it is Him at work in me that causes me to obey...without His Spirit, I am nothing...once again an end to me.
So, today as I've taken it easy and have thought alot about this pregnancy and the fears and concerns that I have, I have thought that I need to have an end of me. If I end me, then the struggles and fears of life will pale in comparison to the joys and enjoyment of God.
Lord, please help me to grow in my enjoyment of you that I may become Holy as you are Holy and that me and my desires would die and you would reign in me...in every area. May the view I need to have of you draw me to love you more and may I respond in like to those around me because of what You have shown me, one who is sooooo unworthy. I love you Lord.