I have really been working on trying to stay calm...not always working, but I am learning to Trust the Lord in new ways (or maybe they are old ways since the Lord is always teaching me trust in my pregnancies). I have been reading "The Pleasures of God" by John Piper and am realizing more and more that I need to take pleasure in God. I do think that in doing so, I will become more focused on Him, and less focused on me. It's so hard to do...especially as I near the time when we lost Nathan. However, I know what God wants me to do and I really want to follow in obedience.
Today I am seeing the specialist to see what his opinion is as to what I do for this pregnancy. I don't entirely know what they will do, but I will be glad to hopefully hear our baby's heartbeat as well as know that everything is okay for now.
I know that God is great and that He is sovereign. After all, He chose me and made me His workmanship so that I would do the good works He's planned for me to bring Him honor and glory. I can't wait to see how He will use this pregnancy to bring honor and glory to Him!
UPDATE: Everything came out good...and I don't have to get a cerclage (my cervix measured great!) I will however be checked again next week and we will see how it is going then. I really liked the perinatologist and can't wait to see what else is in store.